Pinterest Moms

(Disclaimer, if any of these things apply to you, know that I am not dissing them. Just sharing my observations and how they do or don't always apply to my life.)

Pinterest. It is a love/hate relationship. So many good ideas, so many opportunities to make a person feel inferior. So many things that make you go what the heck. I enjoy Pinterest over all. Knitting patterns, random things that make me happy. The fun stuff. But then there is the Pinterest Mom. I made the fatal mistake of looking up stay at home mom stuff. Holy crap. And now my feed is full of this... this... damn, this ain't me stuff.

Here is the Pinterest Mom based on what I see. She is -

• A Christian woman who knows her place is in the home.
• Spends at least 10 minutes every morning reading her bible before waking up the kids and making them a large healthy breakfast.
• Only have small/young children. (I'm not sure what happens to these women when their children grow up. They seem to disappear. This has me a little worried.)
• Home schooling or private schooling.
• Works from home. Usually as a blogger. Main themes are mommy blog or healthy eating blog. Often the two are combined.
• Either stays in shape by doing yoga or embraces whatever weight they are. No in between. 
• Are always fighting the stay at home mom frump. 

What kind of mom I am -

• Atheist liberal feminist stay at home mom. Staying home with the kids worked for us. But it doesn't work for everyone. And there is nothing the fuck wrong with that. 
• Going back to the atheist thing, I don't read the bible. I do try to meditate in the mornings. It is pretty much the only time my mind is quiet. My kids get themselves up and make their own breakfast. They have done that for years. I'm not saying I never made them breakfast, but there is this magical thing called cereal and this miraculous item called a toaster.
• My kids are older. The oldest is a few weeks away from 20 and the youngest is 17. You don't hear much about moms with older kids. That is when the work from home articles really kick in.
• We went with public school. If some other type of schooling works better for you then definitely do that. But public school is not the devil. Some teachers probably are, but you get that no matter where you go to school.  
• I don't work from home. In this case, I'm cool with working from home. Extra income is a good thing. Go you! But please please please be chill about it.
• Overall no problem with the staying in shape or embracing wherever you are body-wise. I'd just like to see some balance. It also seems like the two groups are always bashing each other. That isn't cool.
• Okay, the stay at home mom frump. Tricky issue. I love looking at capsule wardrobes. I like looking put together. Some days I even wear makeup! But it is forced down our throats. How dare we look like we just rolled out of bed? How can you have any dignity wearing pajamas while dropping your kids off at school? The shame you must feel wearing workout clothes when not working out! Dude. I know these people writing this stuff aren't a reflection of real life, but do they know that? Do you want to look fancy? Go for it. Are you happy in leggings and a sweatshirt? Awesome. Jammy day every day? Hell yes.

Are there any other non stereotypical moms out there? Any stay at home moms who would be shunned by the godly women who firmly believe the husband is head of the household and has the final say on everything? I know there are. Somewhere. Just not on Pinterest.

Awkwardly Back

10 or so years ago, I had a blog. It was called Shallow Coffee. And look, a new blog called Shallow Coffee! I had a few followers and just in case they find me again I will give an update on myself. A lot has changed in 10 years. I mean a freaking lot.  Don't worry some things have remained the same. Still married. Still a mom of 2. Still have a shiny happy mental illness. Take comfort in the familiar.

My youngest is now a junior in High School. I'm not sure when he magically became a 17 year old young man, but I think it was probably when I wasn't looking. I'm pretty sure he will be focusing on computer programming when he gets to college. But he could surprise us. Oh my gosh, he has to start thinking about college. That doesn't seem possible.

My oldest will be 20 this month. She came out as transgender about a year and a half ago. It has been interesting having a daughter. She has never been happier, and that is all I want for her. And also for her to go back to school full time instead of part time. (Hi, honey! I know you are reading this and it comes as no surprise. But you do you.) She has given me permission to blog about my roller coaster of feelings when she came out. I told her she could guest post if she wants. We brainstormed topics. So far we the best topic we have come up with is "WTF is wrong with people".

Still married to Chris. The man, the myth, the puts up with me legend. He works hard for the family and he finally broke me and now I like classic Doctor Who. I can't imagine being without him. He is stuck with me, but he doesn't seem to mind.

As for me personally, well there have been the usual ups and downs. New discoveries about myself. Yay, blog topics ahoy! The biggest change is that I am middle age and no longer give a shit about what most people think about me. It is pretty freeing. I'm giving myself permission to get rid of any outside negativity in my life. Uh, still working on getting rid of internal negativity. It's a life long process.

So there you go, Shallow Coffee. A blog about my random feelings and my random life.